The final stop on the Santa Claus trail is at Antalya, the main town of the Turkish Mediterranean coast. Antalya is a scenic four to five hour bus ride from Kas or Myra, through forested landscapes. The relaxing drive portends of things to come, however. The road expands to several lanes as you near Antalya, and the gas stations mutate from a shack, a pump, and a Turkish gentleman to massive service stations that appear -- no, wait, they are -- cloned from American ones. Perhaps that's why they have the same brand names? Yes, gas stations complete with food stores selling cold drinks, hot dogs, and microwavable food.
Antalya is a return to the world of concrete, whether piled high in symmetrical structures or laid flat in intersecting stretches. However, it does have charm, especially in the old city. ("Kaleiçi.") Antalya is a very vibrant metropolis, not only from the tourist trade but because it is a major Turkish port. Unaccompanied females be forewarned of the hordes of sailors, especially -- you guessed it -- near the water.
Airline tickets to other cities in Turkey are very inexpensive in Antalya, especially if you have a flexible schedule and can fly at night. Our tickets to Istanbul were US$50, and other travelers told us of $30 late night fares.
Our choice for lodging was the Ozmen Pansiyon, in Kaleiçi. (Kiliçarslan Mah, Zeytin Çikmazi No. 5 Tel. 242-241-6505.) A very pleasant and clean pension, buried in the depths of the old town. You have to wander a maze of thin streets filled with Turkish families enjoying the fresh air to get in and out. (Doubles with private toilets about $15 US.)
Santa's Bones
What remains of the Jolly Old Elf rest at the impressive Archaeological Museum, in a red-lined case. Only a few bones have been preserved. (And the bone on the left looks more like Rudolf's to me.) It's very bizarre staring at St. Nick's bones. You expect the Easter Bunny's femur to be in the next case over.
A FINAL NOTE FOR YOUR CHILDREN
Persistent rumors say that the bones in the red case are not Santa's. DNA tests have proved inconclusive, fueling speculation Santa is still alive. Knowledgeable locals say Saint Nicholas grew so tired of the oppressive heat of Southern Turkey that he retired to the coldest place he could think of, the North Pole. He met a wonderful woman, who was an excellent cook, and married her. Despite Mrs. Claus's cooking skills and his newfound hobby of training reindeer to fly, Santa grew bored of retirement. One day, he made a decision: although he was the patron saint of travelers and sailors, he decided to focus on the children.
The rest you know.
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